Fertility

After a loss: healing, and trying again when ready

5 min read · MyBloomingBelly editorial

If you are reading this after a miscarriage, start here: it was not your fault. Not the coffee, not the workout, not the stress, not the argument, not lifting that bag. Around 1 in 6 known pregnancies ends in miscarriage, the great majority caused by random chromosomal errors present from the moment of conception — a page torn in the copying, nothing you did or could have prevented.

The grief is real grief and it follows no schedule. You lost a future you had already begun living in — a due date, a name half-chosen, a version of next year. Partners often grieve differently (quieter, later, or through busyness), which can feel like distance; it usually isn’t. Naming the loss to each other, and to the few people you choose, tends to heal more than silence. In India especially, where miscarriage is often hushed, hear this: you are allowed to mourn openly, and you are in enormous, invisible company.